I love Katie Holmes
Dear Pod
I have to say right now, in the event that you are inclined to "find God" in your life, neither your pa nor myself will stop you. You can be go with whatever religion that gives you peace of mind and a mountain load of money we're fairly happy to go along with. In fact, tell us where that mountain load is so that we can pay off our mortgage happily ever after.
The only thing to your pathway to enlightenment, you'd need to go at it yourself. I'm game to play a round or two of hide and seek with you but you'll have to go "seek God" on your own. Neither your father nor I are equipped at all with this task. He is a beer guzzling hedon while I have trouble believing that I can poo naturally ever again after last weekend's bout of stomach flu.
Traditionally your parents are Christians and you're likely to be baptised in a church service and we'll do fun things like christmas, easter and the works. However what we'll not tell you is that there is only one religion that sends you straight to heaven. God, in whatever form of belief, has got to be too big to be contained in one doctrine.
Take for instance - your grandma has given me a book entitled Supernatural Childbirth. I read a couple of pages just to be opened to everything. It claims that if I have enough of belief in God to release the curses listed in Deuteronomy by the new convenant in Galatians, I am freed from labour pains. So long as I believe hard enough, pray hard enough I am set free from the curse of child birth. Also because the writer who gives 10% of their salary in tithes to the church, they are claiming "tithing rights" to not have a premature child. For a fact, I know of someone personally who has in fact delivered 3 children without any labour pains and she is a staunch Buddhist.
While I defintely do not want you to be premature (especially since I have no income to give 10% therefore no supernatural privelleges for me), in a sick way, I want to experience some form of labour pain. In fact, I am going to feel rather cheated if I don't have it. After a bloating like a helium balloon, I want bragging rights that I endured some bit of labour pain! Give me! Give me! No one understand me with this, not even your clever, logical, sane, hedon father, watching childbirth programme on Channel 70 makes me psyched out for labour pains. So much so that I am looking forward to writhing and whinning (I love whinning). Your father thinks I'm setting up myself to be depressed and worried. I am pumped and psyched that I want to jump up and down the couch and yell: I LOVE KATIE HOLMES!
*Flops*
I have to say right now, in the event that you are inclined to "find God" in your life, neither your pa nor myself will stop you. You can be go with whatever religion that gives you peace of mind and a mountain load of money we're fairly happy to go along with. In fact, tell us where that mountain load is so that we can pay off our mortgage happily ever after.
The only thing to your pathway to enlightenment, you'd need to go at it yourself. I'm game to play a round or two of hide and seek with you but you'll have to go "seek God" on your own. Neither your father nor I are equipped at all with this task. He is a beer guzzling hedon while I have trouble believing that I can poo naturally ever again after last weekend's bout of stomach flu.
Traditionally your parents are Christians and you're likely to be baptised in a church service and we'll do fun things like christmas, easter and the works. However what we'll not tell you is that there is only one religion that sends you straight to heaven. God, in whatever form of belief, has got to be too big to be contained in one doctrine.
Take for instance - your grandma has given me a book entitled Supernatural Childbirth. I read a couple of pages just to be opened to everything. It claims that if I have enough of belief in God to release the curses listed in Deuteronomy by the new convenant in Galatians, I am freed from labour pains. So long as I believe hard enough, pray hard enough I am set free from the curse of child birth. Also because the writer who gives 10% of their salary in tithes to the church, they are claiming "tithing rights" to not have a premature child. For a fact, I know of someone personally who has in fact delivered 3 children without any labour pains and she is a staunch Buddhist.
While I defintely do not want you to be premature (especially since I have no income to give 10% therefore no supernatural privelleges for me), in a sick way, I want to experience some form of labour pain. In fact, I am going to feel rather cheated if I don't have it. After a bloating like a helium balloon, I want bragging rights that I endured some bit of labour pain! Give me! Give me! No one understand me with this, not even your clever, logical, sane, hedon father, watching childbirth programme on Channel 70 makes me psyched out for labour pains. So much so that I am looking forward to writhing and whinning (I love whinning). Your father thinks I'm setting up myself to be depressed and worried. I am pumped and psyched that I want to jump up and down the couch and yell: I LOVE KATIE HOLMES!
*Flops*
posted by Mum & Dad at 9:59 PM
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